Thanks for the birthday wishes, parents, LOL

I was all prepared to have a classic alcoholic birthday. You know, wake up miserable about no one noticing the date, then hit the bottle.

And then Julia Gale of Broker’s Gin left this amazing message on my FB page.

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And humanity is redeemed. Who cares if my parents forget my birthday now? I have Julia, not to mention a wonderful bowler hat she sent me, allowing me to go from this:

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and this:

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to this:

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and then to this:

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Ahhh, Julia, you’ve made my day. And to all my FB friends and fellow inebriates, thank you!

Of course I still plan to hit the bottle ASAP.

The good, the bad, and the ugly on turning 44

My Fellow Inebriates,

My mum has unequivocally entered her mid-40s. Check out the gift I wanted to get her but didn’t actually get around to buying:

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Four shot glasses. Because she’s 44.

Now you may think 44 is old, and I’d agree with you, but my mother was characteristically touchy about it.

ME: “So, what are we toasting with?”

MUM: “Nothing, I have to work.”

ME: “I mean later.”

MUM: “Nothing, I have to work all day.”

ME: “To earn money for liquor?”

Silence.

ME: “Or to earn money for some weird-ass endangered-animal secretion that you can smooth on your saggy skin?”

MUM: “I know of only one endangered animal. And its secretions are odious.”

OMG!

A birthday cake? You shouldn’t have…

Check it out, my fellow inebriates…my belated birthday cake.

Well, not just mine. I had two co-celebrants: a poodle and a chihuahua. Note (if you can make it out) the doggie candles. It seems we had no bear candles.

It is a marble cake with white chocolate and milk chocolate drizzle. According to the humans it turned out pretty well, although if you visit the recipe page you’ll note the absence of kirsch, brandy, rum, Bailey’s, Kahlua, or even Malibu!

And I am freaking terrified of fire.