rum

The frosty summer recipe you can’t live without

My fellow inebriates,

Sometime ago I tweeted to Wendy’s, urging them to bring back the vanilla frosty. They had eliminated it for no obvious reason, although I suspected COVID-19 had reduced demand, rendering two oozing machines excessive.

You may think alcoholic bears don’t like ice cream (or ice cream facsimiles). But as I explained to Wendy’s in my tweet, I like to put Crown Royal in a vanilla frosty. And it just has to be vanilla, because chocolate is distracting.

Well, today I learned that Wendy’s was listening! My fellow inebriates, it was so gratifying to know that they took my tweet to heart. They brought back the vanilla frosty, and now I feel heard, seen, and valued.

So, my fellow inebriates, now you can do it too! Here’s how:

  • You need a mickey or a flask of Crown Royal. Most Wendy’s restaurants will not let you open-carry your booze, so be discreet.
  • Order a frosty! They’re 99 cents right now.
  • Scoop out some of the ice cream (or facsimile). Give it to a small child—or even a nasty teenager if that’s who accompanied you to Wendy’s.
  • Now that you’ve made space, pour your Crown Royal in. Stir it up! I like a 2:1 Crown-to-frosty ratio, but you may prefer just a taste… say, 1–2 tbsp (what I call a breakfast frosty).
  • Drink the rest of your mickey or flask.
  • If the teenager is 16+, let them drive home.        

What do YOU like to put in your frosty? If you’ve tried something besides Crown Royal (tequila? rum?) tell me all about it! Drop me a line.

The kids WANT me to drink

Not only do the kids regularly DRIVE me to drink; they WANT me to drink. Look at these awesome pictures Miss V drew for me.

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I think it must be a tequila sunrise.

 

Something tells me that has rum in it. And vodka.

Something tells me this has rum in it. 

 

When I asked V what this one was, she said "orange crush." So there you have it: orange crush with vodka. Happy Friday, methinks.

When I asked V what this one was, she said “orange crush.” So there you have it: orange crush with vodka. Happy Friday, methinks.

Give that cat a drink

My mum yelled at me today because—again—my name showed up in one of her client emails. She said it was embarrassing, even mortifying, to receive a response with “Liquorstore Bear” in the address field. We have no idea how that happened, but she’s been giving me the evil eye.

So, I needed something to cheer me up. Just a little something, my fellow inebriates, because I don’t really like getting yelled at for technical problems. I don’t even have fingers for typing, so how could I have insinuated myself into my mum’s professional life?

I was actually feeling pretty sniffly-sad. And then I saw this awesome pic.

http://imgur.com/gallery/vYaQ94n
MEWBACCA! http://imgur.com/gallery/vYaQ94n

Right? I have never seen anything more rad.

And, lest you think it irrelevant to the ramblings of a liquor-obsessed bear, here’s a drink in honor of this awesome animal.

HAIRY WOOKIE

1/4 cup Everclear® alcohol
1/4 cup Bacardi® 151 rum
1/2 cup Bailey’s® Irish cream
1/4 cup Jagermeister® herbal liqueur
1/2 cup Blue Curacao liqueur
1 cup milk
3 cups ice

Combine all ingredients in a blender. Blend well until smooth and pour into a pitcher. Pour into Liquorstore Bear’s mouth.

Thank you, Drinks Mixer. And thank you, Mewbacca.