What you can do for Boston

It’s hard to even think about posting something light-hearted in the wake of yet another tragic, fucked-up disaster. It happened in the US, but it could have happened anywhere.

I felt stunned and powerless all day yesterday. I still do. The thing that haunts me most is the randomness—the whole idea that during a celebratory event, some person or persons should wish to kill and maim and frighten.

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But what stood out were the images of people at the scene—some injured themselves—running not away but toward other victims to help. I saw courage and generosity and determination.

So a big fuck you to the depraved piece of shit whose senseless act only highlighted the heroism and strength of the community in rising to the tragedy. Fuck you, you worthless nonentity.

As for Boston, what can we do to help?

Donate money.

Lives will need to be put back together, physically and psychologically. Within the next 24-48 hours the Boston Marathon website and Facebook page will have donation links. Already in place is The One Fund Boston, formed today by Massachusetts Governor Deval Patrick and Boston Mayor Thomas Menino to raise money for families most affected by the tragedy.

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Donate blood and keep on donating.

Boston hospitals have enough right now, so don’t FedEx any, but give blood locally and regularly because there’s always a need.

I don’t have any blood, so I had to give money, which was fine because I had misbegotten earnings sitting in my PayPal account following my little adventure with anchor-text advertising. It had been earmarked for gin, but donating it felt much better.

As for my parents, they don’t know it yet, but I’ve booked them in for a blood donation—especially my mum, whose universal-donor type O blood is always in demand right here in our community. My dad doesn’t even know what his blood type is, if you can believe it, so he’ll be thrilled that he’s going to learn it at the blood bank. They’ll have to back off on the booze a little before donating, but I’ll be happy to pick up their slack.

Cheers, Boston. You didn’t deserve this, and I hope the motherfucker who planted those bombs gets caught.

What can a Canadian say about Friday?

After a CNN binge, cuddles with kids who have no idea why they’re suddenly being held extra-tight, and a gamut of complicated feelings following the Connecticut shooting, I thought the best thing I could do for my readers yesterday was shut the fuck up and not post anything.

Most of my readership is American. I live 67 blocks from the Canada-US border. I watch American TV, consume American products, and inhale American politics perhaps more voraciously than Canadian politics…

People often ask why Canadians follow American news so closely and are so openly invested in what goes on south of the border. Plenty of writers have addressed this question much more eloquently and with much more intellectual rigor than this blog ever could. Suffice to say that, culturally, we marinate in the same juices. And while plenty of Canadians (and other western nations) are asking “what the fuck?” about American gun laws, American mental health provisions, and the general economic desperation in which America finds itself, it would be sheer hypocrisy for me as a Canadian to say our nation doesn’t incubate its own complement of psychos who, if as easily weaponized as their US counterparts, would easily achieve the same percentage of horror.

So what the fuck, then?

Leaving aside desensitization and disenfranchisement and alienation for discussion by all the douchebag talking-head psychologists rising to their 15 minutes of fame being interviewed by famous lisping reporters who should retire instead of prodding nine-year-old children for interviews about escaping death, what the fuck is there to say to my friends in the country to the south to which I feel so culturally connected?

I’m sorry.

My first impulse was to say “what the fuck?” about your gun laws and your mental-health legislation and the dominance of the NRA, but what I really need to say to you is I’M SORRY. I’m sorry this awful thing happened. I’m sorry these things continue to happen. I’m sorry so many of your population do not feel protected without weaponry. I’m sorry that weaponry falls into the wrong hands. I’m sorry the NRA is responding to Friday’s tragedy by proposing handgun laws be relaxed so teachers can pack a weapon in class. I’m sorry you will never be able to feel safe dropping your children off at school again.

I finally turned off the news yesterday when I heard the quote from a little boy who had just learned his sister had been killed. “Who will I play with? I don’t have anybody to play with.”

I felt…I couldn’t function in a world where that was a reality. It can’t be like this. Really, it can’t fucking be like this. There must be something we can do to make it not be like this.

What can people from other nations do?

Treasure our friendships with Americans.

Some of the coolest people I know are from the US. We have family in the US. It’s a pleasure to correspond with smart, funny, interesting Americans knowing that we share values of kindness, fairness, honesty, and humor. We’re all fighting the good fight—raising kids to be decent and striving for a good society, trying to be kind to each other and feel safe. We need to show support for that good fight—because it’s hard to feel strong when your most vulnerable citizens are targeted.

Try to understand the problem.

Watching Obama’s speech following the shooting, I had the overwhelming sense that he, too, was thinking What the fuck? How can this keep happening? It’s not a simple problem to shut down, and powerful interests are involved. Obama gets blocked on just about everything he tries to accomplish. The Second Amendment is sacrosanct despite its archaic origins. Not only that—the Second Amendment aligns with all sorts of other polarizing issues. The whole thing is a fucking hornet’s nest.

Express our wishes, no matter how naïve.

I would like to see Obama, having just won a four-year term, say out loud: “The right to bear arms is untenable.” Maybe he can’t, and probably he won’t, but that’s what people from other nations are saying. Paradigm shifts do happen, but sometimes we have to make them happen.

Pressure the US about gun control.

If the world is a village, it’s our job to make our voices heard, even if they are small. Gun violence represents a national emergency in the US. Just this week two potential mass shootings were averted (Indiana and Colorado). How many more bad ideas are smoldering in the minds of heavily armed, mentally disturbed individuals? What does it take to ignite a bad idea such as shooting up an elementary school? One bad day?

Following the 1996 massacre at Dunblane Primary School in Scotland, handgun ownership was banned in the UK. But the discussion can’t even get onto the US table without people screeching about Second Amendment rights. Sorry, my American friends, the Second Amendment is killing you.

For most of the civilized world, curtailing handgun ownership is a no-brainer. How many more children have to die for it to become a no-brainer in the US?

So I’ll sign petitions, I’ll write letters—I will do whatever it takes to poison the idea that carrying or even owning a handgun is normal.

As a Canadian the number one thing I want to express to the US is compassion. We wept watching the news this week.

The number two thing is outrage. The aphorism that “guns don’t kill people, people kill people” is bullshit. People kill people when they have weapons.

I know this space isn’t the place for a long rant about gun control. This blog is intended to be a humorous space, or at least it tries. But I couldn’t think of anything else except: holy shit, America, I want you to be safe.

Connecticut shooting victim names