Is your Halloween checklist complete? The must-have ingredient you may be missing…

The Halloween shopping happened today.

One black cat with sparkly ears and pink wig…Check.

One jeweled princess with spare doll-size outfit (guess who’s wearing it)…Check.

Two pumpkins sitting outside so they don’t rot before the big day…Check.

Six bags of Halloween candy…Not safe to buy it yet; my mum will devour it.

Pumpkin carving kit…OMG, pumpkin guts make me barf! I hate being near that stuff. What if they try and rope me into it? OMG!!

Vodka to make a Pumpkin Divine…Not yet…

After all that relentless shopping, could they not stop into the liquor store for some Grey Goose and triple sec, then find out where the hell Martha Stewart’s enemies might find pumpkin butter? (What the crap is that anyway??)…Oh hell, just vodka would have done. Somebody make one and tell me how it tastes! Meanwhile, I’ll make one here with…gin…and Malibu. Close enough.