“Like that’ll ever happen,” said Dolly…

Not the first time Dolly has been hurtful. A certifiable furvert, she has historically been willing to slum it with me on Valentine’s Day.

How many Valentine's Days ago was this? Dolly says she can't remember it ever having happened, and that I have "mad Photoshop skills."

How many Valentine’s Days ago was this? Of this photo Dolly says, “LB, you have mad Photoshop skills.”

Say what she will, Dolly has occasionally gone in for some snuggles. But lately so many new bears have entered the house that my chances of winning her back are nil. Even the elementary school is sending home bears for sleepovers…big bears who are really furry—not “matted, mangy, and alcoholic” and who “don’t smell like liver failure.”

So my Valentine’s Day wish is a little less romantic now.


But still hopeful.

The 6-year-old take on interspecies relationships

Unfamiliar, at age six, with the term “bestiality,” little Miss P can nevertheless identify a mismatched couple when she sees one. Thus we have the following pic of Dolly:

And yours truly:

I don’t have a chance at making this work.

No V-Day cuddles for LB

I love the whole idea of Valentine’s Day! Romance, cuddles, bestiality–but for whatever reasons (okay, hygiene and possibly good taste) it’s not in the cards for me and Dolly this year. Hope you all made out better than I, my fellow inebriates. If not, here are some consolation pics 😉