7 life hacks, some of which are, like, totally not life hacks

My Fellow Inebriates,

If I see one more a common-sense procedure referred to as a “life hack,” I’m going to start ripping my fur out drinking (more).

Unload the bottom rack of your dishwasher first. That way, water won’t drip from the top dishes onto the bottom ones.

OMG. I mean, duh. This is less a “life hack” than “being sober while you unload the dishwasher.”

Instead of making a grocery list, photograph the shelves of your cupboards and fridge with your cell phone so you have a visual.

Right. I mean, a visual of all the stuff that’s not there—which you’ll remember. This seems less a “life hack” than “having shit for brains.”

Okay, so what are some useful life hacks?


A good idea, sure…maybe with a better beer. Not really a hack, though.



Okay, maybe. This is getting a little too close to solid-food territory, if you ask me.



Now we’re talking. That, my fellow inebriates, is a hack.



And that’s totally a hack. Too bad Dad didn’t think of it before the kids learned to swing themselves.


Still waiting for the ULTIMATE life hack… Okay, so it doesn’t really even have to be a hack. Just a good idea… A good idea that will get me loaded.

make apple cider

Bingo! And that’s what we’re doing next at LBHQ. Maybe Cider Monger will review us.