Your liquor cabinets are awesome, people

Yesterday’s call for liquor-cabinet pictures was a huge success. Not only did I receive detailed inventories of your booze collections, my fellow inebriates, but my inbox contained these awesome pics.

Said Emily: “Our alcohol collection gives yours a run for its money.” Yes, it does—we have no vodka in our house at all, never mind a bottle dedicated specifically to mixing with baby formula. With a KitchenAid mixer to break up the resultant curds! Lucky baby!

♦ ♦ ♦

Next up: A fantastic inventory from beerbecue with suggestions of wine and beer not depicted but also present in the house. (Note the family-friendly “Disney Princess hair salon comb.”)

Damn, this is what I’m talking about—a decent booze collection. I was going to tape this picture to my dad’s head after he went to bed, but…I passed out first.

♦ ♦ ♦

Sadly, Miss R’s camera was stolen in Las Vegas last year, but she described an inventory that easily eclipses LBHQ’s with its third- and quarter-bottles of Tanqueray and Bacardi respectively plus tonic, limes, and “cheap-ass beer.” Like ours, the collection resides in a bottom kitchen shelf. Thinking I would find a proxy photograph, I googled everything Miss R described and got this:

Can you believe it? It’s a cake. Which has little to do with Miss R’s liquor cabinet and—if cooking gin and thereby burning off its alcohol is involved—is something of a heresy. Still, it’s pretty cool-looking. It just so happens that my Nana—the one with the bionic knee—is a professional cake decorator who blows our minds with an amazing cake every time P or V has a birthday.

Maybe, when V turns 5 this September, Nana will make her a Tanqueray cake.

♦ ♦ ♦

Keep sending those liquor-cabinet pics here, my fellow inebriates!

What a liquor cabinet’s NOT supposed to look like

Friends, this is our so-called liquor cabinet.

Look at it. Goofy wine charms, but is there wine? Nooo. Big-ass wine bottle opener, sure, but is there wine? Holy crap, no. They’re storing instant hot chocolate and muffin tins in there.

And books. And old gift bags. Oh yeah, and did I mention the bottles in there are mostly empty?

I bet all of you have more impressive liquor cabinets. Let’s see your pictures, my fellow inebriates—maybe we can exert some pressure on my parents to smarten up and devote a reasonable area to booze. If you have a pic of your liquor collection, send it here and I’ll post it.