BROKER’S GIN

My Fellow Inebriates,

I need to score some BROKER’S GIN. I just realized my local liquor store no longer carries it—OMG!! I took it for granted; I thought it would always be there. Even when I wasn’t thinking about it, somewhere inside I had the comforting notion that it would be there when I decided it was gin-and-tonic time.

Yes, I did rhapsodize the other day about BEEFEATER, an awesome gin and the definitive choice for juniper fans. I love BEEFEATER, my peeps, but there’s a time and a place for it. BEEFEATER is for lurching around with older relatives at weddings and wakes. It’s great for sipping in a martini while you listen to loud, loud music. It’s fantastic at an airport when it could be 7:00 a.m. or 2:00 p.m. for all you know because you lost your watch in the toilet. I totally love the stuff.

But I have to tell you about BROKER’S. Compared to BEEFEATER, it is a cheeky upstart—but an upstart with a mission to create an unapologetically old-fashioned gin bespeaking London and its heritage. Using quadruple distillation, the fourth pass going through a copper pot still, brothers Andy and Martin Dawson combined their solid business acumen, their creativity, and some funny hats in 1998, to create a memorably dry, full-bodied gin.

SO WHY THE HELL CAN’T I FIND IT IN MY LIQUOR STORE ANY MORE? Seriously, I want to ask Andy and Martin what’s going on…why BROKER’S was in my liquor store and isn’t any more. Are they okay? OMG, is BROKER’S okay? Are they still making it? Are they doing great but have cut Canada off? Do they think Canadians are hooligans? OMG!

BROKER’S has captured dozens of international awards for its fresh, dry and slightly floral gin. I know we swill a lot of Molson Canadian here in the Great White North, but there must be animals and humans besides yours truly with a bad-ass jones for this crystal-clear elixir.

Did I mention it was cheap compared to other premium gins? Given the labor-intensive production methods the brothers use to make the stuff, this didn’t even compute when I first bought it, but it didn’t matter, because I had my heavenly gin. Where, oh where, can I get a bottle of BROKER’S? Dear followers, please help me.

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11 responses to “BROKER’S GIN”

  1. Julia Gale - Business Development Manager says :

    Greetings from Broker’s Gin!! Dreadful to hear that you can’t get any of our fine gin at the moment, especially as you’re obviously a fan. I know that Ontario is awash with the stuff at the moment so maybe you’re from another province. If you drop us a line to broker@brokersgin.com with some more information, we’ll try to help!

    • liquorstorebear says :

      Julia, delighted to hear from you! You’re right; it is dreadful that I can’t find Broker’s Gin at the moment. Ontario is full of hooligans so I wonder why they have it and we don’t here in beautiful British Columbia, where is is mild all year and perfect for making a gin-and-tonic every single day. Of course I also wanted the little hat from on top of the bottle. I thought that after finishing the contents I could wear the little hat and look like you, Andy, and Martin–all so smart and British-looking. If you have any inside knowledge on where to buy Broker’s in BC I’d be very grateful. Cheers!

      • Julia Gale - Business Development Manager says :

        Morning Liquorstorebear. I don’t think I can go along with your statement that the residents of Ontario are hooligans! As fans of Broker’s Gin, they are obviously refined and distinguished people of great taste. I do apologise about the situation in BC; we’re hoping to get Broker’s Gin back on the shelves next year. In the meantime, have you thought of popping over the border into Washington State? We’re available in virtually all the state liquor stores there and, as well as being able to buy 47% Broker’s instead of the 40% Broker’s found in Ontario, it’s also much cheaper because of the level of taxation. If you send me your email address I can add you to our newsletter list and then you’ll know as soon as there is news on sunny BC.

  2. liquorstorebear says :

    Thank you Julia! I will ask the humans here if they have any criminal convictions that might prevent them from going over the border to get me some Broker’s. They are pretty boring so it should be all right. Also, I will write to Santa Claus for some Broker’s ASAP because it’s that time of year when he gets off the couch and does some work.
    Why does Broker’s in Canada have 40% instead of 47%? OMG, I never knew about that; it could spawn a whole article on this site. It’s just that our beer tends to be stronger up here, so you’d figure we could handle 47% gin. What do you think, Julia?

    • Julia Gale - Business Development Manager says :

      Hi Liquorstore Bear

      I’m so sorry that I didn’t write before. Us Brits are modest chaps at the best of times and I was still recovering from the compliments you paid me on your blog. As you imagine, I have been told since that you don’t know me like others know me etc etc etc 😦

      Well, in the meantime, I have been trying to persuade stores in other parts of Canada to disguise bottles of Broker’s Gin in plain brown wrappers in order to ship them across the borders under cover of darkness but I’ve received quite firm and negative responses. It’s not as though anyone would have died or anything …. Presumably you don’t shoot people for smuggling a bottle of gin in a good cause in 2011. And as for why the strength is different, it’s baffling. Like I said before, I guess it’s just down to taxation as the US get off very lightly. Would you believe it’s cheaper for me to buy a bottle of gin in a liquor store in the USA than it is to buy a bottle here at cost price with only the duty on top? Madness!

      The good news is that both Andy and Martin, our owner/directors, are off to darkest BC in the New Year to try and reinstate your supply. Maybe you could get some TV coverage by getting together with some of your furry friends and chaining yourself to a prominant railing somewhere. That’d get Broker’s Gin noticed and customers demanding that it appear on your shores once more.

      I’ll keep you posted!

      • liquorstorebear says :

        Julia!!

        Ignore anything I might have said recently.

        I looked into the question of cross-border shopping for Broker’s Gin (soon to be expanded upon in “Broker’s Gin Part 3”). The border guards are pretty zealous with their requirements, at least three of which I fail to satisfy: (1) passport; (2) fingerprints; (3) a searchable cavity.

        After this I became disconsolate and may have temporarily displaced my affections. Drunken ravings, I say! What’s important is you’re back–and with some pretty viable suggestions.

        Sadly I don’t yet have a lot of traction with television news, but I might still chain myself somewhere just for kicks.

        Very nice to hear Andy and Martin are visiting BC. Why are you not joining them? It sounds like a bit of a sausage fest, just the three of us boys getting drunk together and laughing at each other’s hats.

        Can’t wait to hear more! In the meantime I will find some small handcuffs.

        • Julia Gale - Business Development Manager says :

          Greetings young bear. Apologies for the lack of response. I have been struck low literally as I’ve been bed and/or sofa-ridden for a week. I have just staggered back into the office somewhat unsteadily to find that there has been much talk of handcuffs and cavity searching in my absence. It all seems rather drastic so I hope that more traditional steps to restock BC will bear fruit before you have to submit yourself to any demeaning procedures. As I shall be departing for the windswept west coast (of the UK) in a couple of days, may I wish you and dolly a very happy Christmas and New Year x

          • liquorstorebear says :

            OMG, who’s talking about those things? What sort of strange proclivities do the people at Broker’s Gin have, Julia? No wonder you’ve been ill–that stuff will take it out of a person.
            I’m delighted to hear that steps will be taken to restock BC. As you know, I am very anxious about the gin situation. But do not worry about my being demeaned–it’s a natural way of life for me.
            Dolly asked me to stop mentioning her, but I’m sure she will have a lovely holiday (she has a bear fetish, and there are plenty of us in the house, so I’ve no doubt the unnatural acts will resume with some other fella).
            Wishing you all the best on your holiday. May it include abundant gin and…well, if you have gin, you have everything.
            Yours ever,
            LB
            PS I will await contact from Andy and Martin when they arrive. Perhaps we can go to a casino.

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