Author: liquorstorebear

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LUCCARELLI NEGROAMARO (2016) — Because it’s Wednesday, dammit

This week I have a find from our local booze shop’s “Consultant’s Choice” display. (Actually there are TWO such displays. I’m praising the <$20 collection—I’ve never had any from the pricey Consultant’s Choice shelf.) For just $13.99, this fruit-forward, full-bodied Italian wine will make your fur stand on end.

puglia.jpg

But before I start mouthing off about wine again, a backgrounder on Puglia. I had no idea it existed, my fellow inebriates, until it appeared on the CC shelf. Puglia wine comes from Italy, where almost anything can grow. According to the Internet, if it contains notes of plum, raspberry and anise, the grapes were probably harvested off the back of the heel of the Italian boot. The bottle we tried, LUCCARELLI NEGROAMARO (2016) is a stunning example of Puglia, and one that we intend to buy repeatedly.

This wine has that quality that makes you go “ahhhh.” It makes you want to lick the bottom of the glass (which I’m not allowed to do even though I’m very absorbent).

What to do with the rest of that zombie pig

My two brain cells subscribe to the Big Think newsletter and today they learned that scientists have successfully re-animated the brains of dead pigs. By using heaters, pumps and artificial blood, a scientific team from Yale University managed to restore partial brain function to the brains of more than 100 recently beheaded pigs.

PIg

WTF, man?

My fellow inebriates, I only have partial brain function! These zombie pigs are probably having much more complex thoughts than yours truly. Like: Wait a sec, I was going through this tunnel toward a bright light, and WTF, man, now I’m a brain in a box?

There are probably a bunch of ethical questions we should be asking. For me, the main question is: What should we do with the rest of the pig?

Betty Crocker says we should make Bacon Infused Vodka. All you need is 2 tbsp. bacon fat (zombie or regular), a 375-mL bottle of vodka and a mason jar. Shake it up, let it sit for 6 hours, then freeze. Then use a cheesecloth (I don’t know what that is so I’ll use one of my dad’s socks), and there you have it!

Bacon vodka

Not gross at all. Photo: Betty Crocker

MFI, I hope you’ll try this and tell me all about it. Apparently there are a lot headless pigs out there that you can use, so get busy!

How candy distracts us from our goals

I’ve been thinking a lot about lost opportunities. Kind of like this bear cub here going into a liquor store—and heading for the CANDY.

I assure you, my fellow inebriates, if I ever get a chance to enter a liquor store, I will head for the single malt scotch.

This little bear cub could use a mentor.